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Sunday, May 31, 2015

The Weather Underground

It's been the kind of weekend where there really doesn't seem to be any point in getting out of bed. Cold, grey, rainy. What I tend to think of as shoe ruining weather. Even the poor dog didn't want to go outside to go to the bathroom. (To be fair, neither would I.) Really, I think my top accomplishment this weekend was watching two episodes of Mad Men. Almost through season five! Then I'm only like three years behind the rest of America.

There was also obedience class (not an S&M thing), although I think that Aubrey's learning may have plateaued. "Sit" and "stay" seemed very credible to her, but "come" has received quite a cold reception and "down" really no recognition at all. If only she were more susceptible to bribery, like me with the McDonald's gift certificates in grade school.

We also watched the Blackhawks game with some friends. I like hockey, mainly because floor hockey allowed me to explore my violent tendencies when I was in junior high. But to be honest mainly I like drinking, which seems to go hand and hand.

And tomorrow it will be June. Time to get out the tube tops, I guess.

Monday, May 25, 2015

The Automotive News

I did end up buying a car this week. It was, as it always must be, a horrific experience. There were so many psychological techniques at play I felt like they were trying to get me to confess to murder. At one point they actually withheld my driver's license and car title from me in an attempt to coerce me to continue negotiating. I was afraid the rubber hoses were going to come out at any moment.

There were also shades of the bad romantic comedy, with lots of twists, turns, and declarations of affection. One dealership manager actually followed me out to the car to try to entice me to come back in with a lowball offer. It was all lies, though, of course. And now I can't get the rejected dealers to stop calling me.

In the end, though, we got a car we liked at a price that didn't feel like (pun definitely intended) highway robbery. It's a Prius C4. Gray. (One place tried to stick us with one that was fire truck red, but I'm not looking for that kind of attention.) Lots of fun options like voice recognition and a back-up camera. I could back up all day long with that thing. And the dog has already shed all over it, so it feels like home.

Now let's not do this again for like another ten years.

Tuesday, May 19, 2015


Let the Good Times Roll
 
My friend Emma had an '80s themed roller skating birthday party in the suburbs. She was turning 35, obviously. It was amazing. There was cardboard/ketchup pizza and everything.
 
 
It was '80s night at the rink, except that no one else was dressed up and they played mainly '90s music. Maybe they didn't have time to consult Wikipedia about what happened in the '80s?



The rainbow suspenders were specially purchased for this event, if you can believe it.


The shorts I've owned for a while, though. They work for so many occasions, but mainly funerals.


Melissa even remembered how to skate backwards. I mainly remembered how to eat cake. I didn't even fall down once, thought!

Thursday, May 14, 2015

Here We Are Again

Busy week.

Went car shopping on Monday night. Embarrassingly enough, this is the first time in my life I've looked for a vehicle without my parents' active involvement. It's kind of icky. A bit like Glengarry Glen Ross come to life. I told them that I wanted to take some time to do some research and think about it and they responded "okay, but why not now?" See, that was the part I had already explained. I do think it's time to part with the 2003 Corolla, though. I think soon it will be just four wheels held together by duct tape.

Tuesday we took our mandatory trip to see the Avengers movie. It was okay. Parts were a bit Whedony for my taste and I can't for the life of me understand why there would be continuity issues with other movies released by the same company last year, but it was entertaining. Also the theater had reclining leather seats, which won me over big time. I could have been watching an auto da fe and been relatively content.

Last night we hung out with my mom and watched Mad Men. We're halfway through Season 5. Clearly we won't catch up before it ends next weekend, but least these episodes aired in the current decade. Although the '00s were very good to me.

So I'm here now. Isn't anything ever good enough for you?

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Sweet Mother of God

Happy Mother's Day, everyone! Does it kind of bother you that it is "mother's" day, singular, when we are supposed to be honoring all mothers, everywhere? No? A lot of things are just me.

We had a good day -- I took my mom to church and then my sister and her husband came over for pizza and frozen yogurt. MTV showed The Parent Trap and several Amanda Bynes movies, as is obviously appropriate for the day. Seriously, what is going on over at MTV? Do they just have an Apple IIe randomly airing shit now?
We also had obedience class. Aubrey is perhaps not the best student. As in she tries to ignore everything that they're trying to teach her and just keeps staring at us in a disbelieving rage. Which is kind of how I was in Con Law, so I get it.

And now I'm like super exhausted. I used to think that might mean there's something medically wrong with me, but now I know it's just life. Beats the alternative.

Sunday, May 03, 2015

By the Book

Since our little Aubrey has taken to eating books off of the bottom shelf, we decided to prune our collection a little bit this weekend. (Some people say that you want your pets to change their behavior to conform to your needs, but in my experience it is definitely the other way around.) This was in part a terrible idea, because driving anywhere in Lakeview on a gorgeous May Saturday when there is both a Cubs game and some sort of kite festival (not making this up) is about the stupidest thing a person can do. It took about an hour, round trip, and that includes the time I saved by simply dropping the books inside the front door of the Brown Elephant without so much as a hello. (If they try to track me down I will simply deny everything. Including climate change.) But it was also kind of fun, because it allowed me to learn that Ian owned Nicole Richie's book. Of course, it also allowed Ian to learn that I not only owned Lauren Conrad's fiction debut, L.A. Candy, but also did not wish to part with it at this time. As I told him, I'm not looking to be a hero here. I'm just trying to keep my dog from choking on Ian's lightly-used kabbalah manual.

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