Tuesday, May 25, 2004
Current Events
– Friendster. Finally, a safe, electronic way to stalk people without ever leaving your home! An added benefit? No one has to know that you’re not really David Hasselhoff.
– Cab Drivers. Thank you so much for all the advice on how to live my life. My advice to you is to back up and see what happened to the bicyclist you hit a few blocks back. Feel free to drop me off at the corner first, though.
– Natural Athletic Grace. I have now fallen down the back steps of my apartment building twice in the past week. If I were eighty, my family would be looking into affordable nursing care right now. But none of this would have happened if they had just put in a fireman’s pole like I asked.
– Wedded Bliss. Before the summer is over I’ll probably drop several thousand dollars on celebrating various friends’ perfect loves. Someone better name a kid after me or something so I can get some return on my investment.
– American Idol. Doesn’t it feel like it should have been over like five years ago? Unless they decide to select the winner through hand-to-hand combat, I’ve kind of lost interest. I do hope Omarosa gets it, though.
– Friendster. Finally, a safe, electronic way to stalk people without ever leaving your home! An added benefit? No one has to know that you’re not really David Hasselhoff.
– Cab Drivers. Thank you so much for all the advice on how to live my life. My advice to you is to back up and see what happened to the bicyclist you hit a few blocks back. Feel free to drop me off at the corner first, though.
– Natural Athletic Grace. I have now fallen down the back steps of my apartment building twice in the past week. If I were eighty, my family would be looking into affordable nursing care right now. But none of this would have happened if they had just put in a fireman’s pole like I asked.
– Wedded Bliss. Before the summer is over I’ll probably drop several thousand dollars on celebrating various friends’ perfect loves. Someone better name a kid after me or something so I can get some return on my investment.
– American Idol. Doesn’t it feel like it should have been over like five years ago? Unless they decide to select the winner through hand-to-hand combat, I’ve kind of lost interest. I do hope Omarosa gets it, though.
