Saturday, January 31, 2009
Surprise
I have had one surprise birthday before -- when I was in law school, Roommate Liz invited me over to her house where some of our friends were and, after about half an hour, brought a cake out of the closet -- but this one was a bit more elaborate. There were all kinds of lies, deceptions, and evasions involved. I thought I was coming home to put on sweat pants and watch Wednesday's Top Chef. Then I briefly thought I was getting robbed. But ultimately I came out on the side of happy good times.
No photo set would be complete without a shot of the camera strap. At least it distracts from the carbohydrates stored away in my face.
Like any 31-year-old's birthday party, there was a High School Musical theme. Jeff seems not to be too amped about the Zac Efron half of the napkins.
But he stands by the Vanessa Hudgens half, despite the nude picture scandal.
Amy got me a Debbie Gibson album, which features five different mixes of Electric Youth. Which means I'm only yearning for like eleven more!
I have had one surprise birthday before -- when I was in law school, Roommate Liz invited me over to her house where some of our friends were and, after about half an hour, brought a cake out of the closet -- but this one was a bit more elaborate. There were all kinds of lies, deceptions, and evasions involved. I thought I was coming home to put on sweat pants and watch Wednesday's Top Chef. Then I briefly thought I was getting robbed. But ultimately I came out on the side of happy good times.
No photo set would be complete without a shot of the camera strap. At least it distracts from the carbohydrates stored away in my face.
Like any 31-year-old's birthday party, there was a High School Musical theme. Jeff seems not to be too amped about the Zac Efron half of the napkins.
But he stands by the Vanessa Hudgens half, despite the nude picture scandal.
Amy got me a Debbie Gibson album, which features five different mixes of Electric Youth. Which means I'm only yearning for like eleven more!Thursday, January 29, 2009
In Which I Am a Truly Wonderful Person
I am teaching young children about the law again tomorrow. It's a different group of kids -- this time seventh and eighth graders, which as compared to fifth and sixth grades have more opinions and more acne -- but it's essentially the same material. I figure I can try to age it slightly by peppering it with curse words. Oh, and I'll change the Miley Cyrus references to Fall Out Boy.
Of course, teaching once again will involve getting up at the ass crack of dawn. I have already dug my car out of the snow and put my stuff in the trunk so I won't have to spend time on that tomorrow morning, but I still think I need to get up at 6:15. Last time I left an hour and a half to drive there and I was five minutes late. Plus I tore through approximately seventy-three yellow lights, which was pushing the odds on a traffic fatality. So I'm both trying a new route and leaving earlier this time. Which likely means I'll get lost and end up running through my lesson plan with the AM crowd at a Wendy's somewhere.
I suppose I should try to go to sleep now. Somehow bed at eleven seems ridiculous, though. Maybe I'll just throw PBS on and try to bore myself to sleep.
I am teaching young children about the law again tomorrow. It's a different group of kids -- this time seventh and eighth graders, which as compared to fifth and sixth grades have more opinions and more acne -- but it's essentially the same material. I figure I can try to age it slightly by peppering it with curse words. Oh, and I'll change the Miley Cyrus references to Fall Out Boy.
Of course, teaching once again will involve getting up at the ass crack of dawn. I have already dug my car out of the snow and put my stuff in the trunk so I won't have to spend time on that tomorrow morning, but I still think I need to get up at 6:15. Last time I left an hour and a half to drive there and I was five minutes late. Plus I tore through approximately seventy-three yellow lights, which was pushing the odds on a traffic fatality. So I'm both trying a new route and leaving earlier this time. Which likely means I'll get lost and end up running through my lesson plan with the AM crowd at a Wendy's somewhere.
I suppose I should try to go to sleep now. Somehow bed at eleven seems ridiculous, though. Maybe I'll just throw PBS on and try to bore myself to sleep.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
A Textual Analysis of Actual Posts on Entertainment Weekly Dot Com's Message Boards
Subject: Fantasia Covers "Lady Marmalade"
Poster: "Ann"
Post: Now that's sanging
Man she tow that up
That is what you call taking them back to school old time funk
Giving you your money worth sanging
I was grinning from ear to ear
I haven't seen anybody tear up the place like that in years
Thank you
Analysis: Notice the creative use of line breaks to direct the reader's attention. The unconventional spellings show the author's status as a rebel, an outsider to the conventions of "polite" literature. The work is much reminiscent of e.e. cummings.
Subject: OscarWatch -- Kate Winslet's Odds?
Poster: bob
Post: Go Kate! 8===1)
Analysis: The author refuses to succumb to the tyranny of words, choosing instead to use characters to construct a vivid picture. Either that, or there was a keyboard mishap that just happens to look like a penis.
Subject: TV Spoilers
Poster: Nate
Post: I can't believe you don't like The United States of Tara. It's brilliant and lovable and I enjoy every minute...and I laugh out loud, which is rare. I am disappointed in you.
Analysis: The author believes that the viewing (or not viewing) of television programs has a moral dimension, and that it is his obligation to save non-Tara-loving souls from themselves. He is also far too fond of the ellipsis, which probably has something to do with not getting enough hugs from his mother at three and a half.
Subject: David Archuleta Announces Tour
Poster: A SMASH HIT DEFINITELY!
Post: IT'S WORTH SEEING DAVID ARCHULETA CONCERT - I ATTENDED HIS CONCERT BEFORE WHAT A GREAT EXPERIENCED - THE ONLY DRAW BACK IS ONCE YOU'VE BEEN TO HIS CONCERT; WANT TO SEE HIM AGAIN AND AGAIN.
YOU ARE JUST ADDICTED TO HIS MUSIC PLUS HE IS VERY GOOD IN LIVE.
IGNORE THOSE HATER FOR THEY ARE JEALOUS AND A DAVID COOK DIE HARD FANS - THEY CAN KISS HIS SMELLY ASS AS MUCH AS THEY WANT - WE COULDN'T CARELESS.
Analysis: The author is clearly insane.
Subject: Fantasia Covers "Lady Marmalade"
Poster: "Ann"
Post: Now that's sanging
Man she tow that up
That is what you call taking them back to school old time funk
Giving you your money worth sanging
I was grinning from ear to ear
I haven't seen anybody tear up the place like that in years
Thank you
Analysis: Notice the creative use of line breaks to direct the reader's attention. The unconventional spellings show the author's status as a rebel, an outsider to the conventions of "polite" literature. The work is much reminiscent of e.e. cummings.
Subject: OscarWatch -- Kate Winslet's Odds?
Poster: bob
Post: Go Kate! 8===1)
Analysis: The author refuses to succumb to the tyranny of words, choosing instead to use characters to construct a vivid picture. Either that, or there was a keyboard mishap that just happens to look like a penis.
Subject: TV Spoilers
Poster: Nate
Post: I can't believe you don't like The United States of Tara. It's brilliant and lovable and I enjoy every minute...and I laugh out loud, which is rare. I am disappointed in you.
Analysis: The author believes that the viewing (or not viewing) of television programs has a moral dimension, and that it is his obligation to save non-Tara-loving souls from themselves. He is also far too fond of the ellipsis, which probably has something to do with not getting enough hugs from his mother at three and a half.
Subject: David Archuleta Announces Tour
Poster: A SMASH HIT DEFINITELY!
Post: IT'S WORTH SEEING DAVID ARCHULETA CONCERT - I ATTENDED HIS CONCERT BEFORE WHAT A GREAT EXPERIENCED - THE ONLY DRAW BACK IS ONCE YOU'VE BEEN TO HIS CONCERT; WANT TO SEE HIM AGAIN AND AGAIN.
YOU ARE JUST ADDICTED TO HIS MUSIC PLUS HE IS VERY GOOD IN LIVE.
IGNORE THOSE HATER FOR THEY ARE JEALOUS AND A DAVID COOK DIE HARD FANS - THEY CAN KISS HIS SMELLY ASS AS MUCH AS THEY WANT - WE COULDN'T CARELESS.
Analysis: The author is clearly insane.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
The Kids Are All Right
My volunteering Saturday morning turned out to be just fine. Well, we ended up just standing around for about 45 minutes before anyone even told us where to go, but there were donuts and the building had those truly effective old radiators, so that was not a big deal. Our two classes have five and four students in them respectively. It turns out the classes we're competing with are things like "fun with percussion" and "cartooning," so we're really only going to get the kids who would rather argue with people than beat on a drum or learn to draw Garfield. (Well, probably it's not Garfield any more. Who are the kids drawing these days? Chelsea Handler?) But I would say those kids probably count for two or three kids each, since they talk incessantly and aren't particularly interested in deferring to an instructor. I may well end up bound with a jumprope and thrown into a broom closet before this is all over.
But anyway, since our first session started late we only had to teach for about half an hour, a decent chunk of which we could fill with get to know you activities, which actually utterly failed to teach me any of the kids' names. (Except for the kid who insisted his name was "Shahshafufu;" him I remember.) The second session we actually had to teach more, so we did a lesson on writing and interpreting laws. Which is pretty useful, because I think half of these kids are state legislators. And judging from their behavior, the other half will be on trial for something before they turn 17. But regardless, we made it through our lesson and they actually seemed pretty into it. And next time will be even better, because we're planning to use a transparency! We are the greatest people in the universe.
My volunteering Saturday morning turned out to be just fine. Well, we ended up just standing around for about 45 minutes before anyone even told us where to go, but there were donuts and the building had those truly effective old radiators, so that was not a big deal. Our two classes have five and four students in them respectively. It turns out the classes we're competing with are things like "fun with percussion" and "cartooning," so we're really only going to get the kids who would rather argue with people than beat on a drum or learn to draw Garfield. (Well, probably it's not Garfield any more. Who are the kids drawing these days? Chelsea Handler?) But I would say those kids probably count for two or three kids each, since they talk incessantly and aren't particularly interested in deferring to an instructor. I may well end up bound with a jumprope and thrown into a broom closet before this is all over.
But anyway, since our first session started late we only had to teach for about half an hour, a decent chunk of which we could fill with get to know you activities, which actually utterly failed to teach me any of the kids' names. (Except for the kid who insisted his name was "Shahshafufu;" him I remember.) The second session we actually had to teach more, so we did a lesson on writing and interpreting laws. Which is pretty useful, because I think half of these kids are state legislators. And judging from their behavior, the other half will be on trial for something before they turn 17. But regardless, we made it through our lesson and they actually seemed pretty into it. And next time will be even better, because we're planning to use a transparency! We are the greatest people in the universe.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Life Decisions
For some reason I agreed to teach a Saturday school class this semester. So instead of following my usual habit of spending Saturday sleeping and watching whatever terrible movies happen to be on HBO (or sometimes even HBO Espanol), I'll be getting up at 7:30 and driving across town to teach a group of fifth grade miscreants about judicial process. To be fair, they will probably want to be there even less than I will, but somehow that doesn't do much to cheer me up.
I'm thinking perhaps I can turn my class into a cult that worships me as their charismatic leader. Or at the very least force them to do yard work. My driveway could certainly use clearing, and it probably wouldn't even take very long for a good sized group of eleven and twelve year olds. I imagine there are Bible verses somewhere that would justify the whole thing. When it comes to the Old Testament, pretty much anything goes.
They have lots of rules at this school. No one is allowed to talk in the hallways ever, and they raise a single fist in the air as a symbol for "quiet, please." Also no food or cell phones (or presumably edible cell phones) are allowed anywhere on the premises. Oh, and any form of joy whatsoever is strictly forbidden. These people mean business.
For some reason I agreed to teach a Saturday school class this semester. So instead of following my usual habit of spending Saturday sleeping and watching whatever terrible movies happen to be on HBO (or sometimes even HBO Espanol), I'll be getting up at 7:30 and driving across town to teach a group of fifth grade miscreants about judicial process. To be fair, they will probably want to be there even less than I will, but somehow that doesn't do much to cheer me up.
I'm thinking perhaps I can turn my class into a cult that worships me as their charismatic leader. Or at the very least force them to do yard work. My driveway could certainly use clearing, and it probably wouldn't even take very long for a good sized group of eleven and twelve year olds. I imagine there are Bible verses somewhere that would justify the whole thing. When it comes to the Old Testament, pretty much anything goes.
They have lots of rules at this school. No one is allowed to talk in the hallways ever, and they raise a single fist in the air as a symbol for "quiet, please." Also no food or cell phones (or presumably edible cell phones) are allowed anywhere on the premises. Oh, and any form of joy whatsoever is strictly forbidden. These people mean business.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
I Know...
I just finished watching the last twenty minutes of I Know Who Killed Me and I have more questions than answers. How did Dakota manage to become a stripper despite moving with the approximate sexiness of Barbara Bush? Why did Aubrey's parents chose to adopt a crack addict's child? Were there no meth addicts available? And why, for that matter, would they only adopt one of a set of twins? And why would they then be so surprised to meet someone who looks like their daughter but claims to not be her? Did Lindsay Lohan think playing twins would rekindle the glory of her Parent Trap days? If so, did she not understand that mischievously bringing her parents back together was an exceedingly important part of that winning formula? Is there really such a thing as stigmatic twins? If so, are the Olsen twins stigmatic? If not, why not? Wouldn't that make them kind of awesome? And possibly remove the specter of How the West Was Fun? Isn't it a lot of trouble for a piano teacher to go to to kidnap and mutilate his students because they threaten to quit? Did he try bribing them with candy first? And what happens in the first sixty minutes of the movie. Is it awesome? Please, I am dying to know.
I just finished watching the last twenty minutes of I Know Who Killed Me and I have more questions than answers. How did Dakota manage to become a stripper despite moving with the approximate sexiness of Barbara Bush? Why did Aubrey's parents chose to adopt a crack addict's child? Were there no meth addicts available? And why, for that matter, would they only adopt one of a set of twins? And why would they then be so surprised to meet someone who looks like their daughter but claims to not be her? Did Lindsay Lohan think playing twins would rekindle the glory of her Parent Trap days? If so, did she not understand that mischievously bringing her parents back together was an exceedingly important part of that winning formula? Is there really such a thing as stigmatic twins? If so, are the Olsen twins stigmatic? If not, why not? Wouldn't that make them kind of awesome? And possibly remove the specter of How the West Was Fun? Isn't it a lot of trouble for a piano teacher to go to to kidnap and mutilate his students because they threaten to quit? Did he try bribing them with candy first? And what happens in the first sixty minutes of the movie. Is it awesome? Please, I am dying to know.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Inauguration Mania!
It turns out there's a lot of inauguration coverage to watch when you're not doing your best to completely block out an entire presidency. I mean, CNN is running a crawl at the bottom of its screen with different color-coded blocks telling you what inauguration events you can see when. Yesterday when I got to the gym they were broadcasting an event where the inauguration train didn't even stop -- just twenty minutes of reporters speculating about when the train would arrive, with the big payoff of footage of Obama waiving from the back porch. When I left, they were showing his speech in Baltimore, which I have to admit was rendered much less inspiring by all the typos on the closed captioning. I decided I would watch it on Youtube later.
Today, of course, is the big inauguration concert, complete with footage of George Lucas awkwardly not singing along with everyone else in the audience on "This Land is Your Land." Seriously, this thing is a treasure trove of awkward. If the spectacle of Shakira singing Stevie Wonder and turning every vowel into some other vowel doesn't do it for you, there's the image of Bono somehow making the civil rights movement all about a white dude from Ireland. Oh, and the sound of Tom Hanks somehow messing up the emphasis on "OF the people, BY the people, and FOR the people." Come on, Tom, I got that one when I had to memorize it in sixth grade.
It turns out there's a lot of inauguration coverage to watch when you're not doing your best to completely block out an entire presidency. I mean, CNN is running a crawl at the bottom of its screen with different color-coded blocks telling you what inauguration events you can see when. Yesterday when I got to the gym they were broadcasting an event where the inauguration train didn't even stop -- just twenty minutes of reporters speculating about when the train would arrive, with the big payoff of footage of Obama waiving from the back porch. When I left, they were showing his speech in Baltimore, which I have to admit was rendered much less inspiring by all the typos on the closed captioning. I decided I would watch it on Youtube later.
Today, of course, is the big inauguration concert, complete with footage of George Lucas awkwardly not singing along with everyone else in the audience on "This Land is Your Land." Seriously, this thing is a treasure trove of awkward. If the spectacle of Shakira singing Stevie Wonder and turning every vowel into some other vowel doesn't do it for you, there's the image of Bono somehow making the civil rights movement all about a white dude from Ireland. Oh, and the sound of Tom Hanks somehow messing up the emphasis on "OF the people, BY the people, and FOR the people." Come on, Tom, I got that one when I had to memorize it in sixth grade.
Friday, January 16, 2009
New Yorker, New Yorker
I recently got a subscription to the New Yorker. I've always enjoyed reading their criticism -- oddly enough because I find it to be more analytical than strictly critical, which I find rather refreshing -- but I tended just to dip into it online on those rare occasions when I was bored at work. Now that I have it, though, I have to say I really enjoy it. It makes me feel smart. I was able to start a conversation with my parents the other day about the Japanese literary genre of cell phone novels (I am not making this up), and yesterday when someone at work started talking about Malcolm Gladwell, I actually knew who that was (and that I'm not his biggest fan). Although some of the longer articles are bit much for me (I didn't really ever need to know that much about the kosher food industry in China) and they allocate more space to Joyce Carol Oates than one would deem strictly necessary, most of it is just the perfect amount of information for one sitting. Perhaps that's why it does so well in dentists' offices.
Of course, each issue has so much content in it that I've immediately fallen a couple of weeks behind. I'm embarrassed to take them on the train with me because I'm convinced people will notice that I have a month-old New Yorker in my hands. It's just like in high school when I missed a week of school for the choir trip to Orlando and had to read all of The Rainbow in one sitting. Well, not exactly like that. The Rainbow had lesbians.
I recently got a subscription to the New Yorker. I've always enjoyed reading their criticism -- oddly enough because I find it to be more analytical than strictly critical, which I find rather refreshing -- but I tended just to dip into it online on those rare occasions when I was bored at work. Now that I have it, though, I have to say I really enjoy it. It makes me feel smart. I was able to start a conversation with my parents the other day about the Japanese literary genre of cell phone novels (I am not making this up), and yesterday when someone at work started talking about Malcolm Gladwell, I actually knew who that was (and that I'm not his biggest fan). Although some of the longer articles are bit much for me (I didn't really ever need to know that much about the kosher food industry in China) and they allocate more space to Joyce Carol Oates than one would deem strictly necessary, most of it is just the perfect amount of information for one sitting. Perhaps that's why it does so well in dentists' offices.
Of course, each issue has so much content in it that I've immediately fallen a couple of weeks behind. I'm embarrassed to take them on the train with me because I'm convinced people will notice that I have a month-old New Yorker in my hands. It's just like in high school when I missed a week of school for the choir trip to Orlando and had to read all of The Rainbow in one sitting. Well, not exactly like that. The Rainbow had lesbians.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
New York, New York
I went to New York for work on Monday. I have to say I was pretty lucky in that I managed to be among the approximately .004% of all flights that have actually made it out of Chicago without some sort of weather disaster lately. In fact, my flights got in early both times. This was great because it allowed me to more fully concentrate on all the joys of business travel: stuffing receipts into every free orifice, trying to locate conference rooms, and desperately seeking cell phone service. Some may disagree, but I genuinely believe that every city is better when you only visit it for 24 hours and spend most of that time working.
Flying into LaGuardia is pretty amazing, though, because it always looks like your pilot has lost his mind and decided to land right on the water. It's not until the very last minute that you can actually see runway, and by then you've already emptied the majority of your complimentary beverage service into your pants. Also, the airport itself kind of looks like a 1980s strip mall on the inside. I'm pretty sure they even have an Orange Julius.
I also got to have dinner with a friend from high school on Monday night. We drank red wine and ate enough that I didn't feel comfortable submitting the receipt to my office for reimbursement afterwards. And as we are both nearly 31 years old, we made it an early night, and I was safely in bed by 11:30 (Eastern). Being lame is completely the best.
I went to New York for work on Monday. I have to say I was pretty lucky in that I managed to be among the approximately .004% of all flights that have actually made it out of Chicago without some sort of weather disaster lately. In fact, my flights got in early both times. This was great because it allowed me to more fully concentrate on all the joys of business travel: stuffing receipts into every free orifice, trying to locate conference rooms, and desperately seeking cell phone service. Some may disagree, but I genuinely believe that every city is better when you only visit it for 24 hours and spend most of that time working.
Flying into LaGuardia is pretty amazing, though, because it always looks like your pilot has lost his mind and decided to land right on the water. It's not until the very last minute that you can actually see runway, and by then you've already emptied the majority of your complimentary beverage service into your pants. Also, the airport itself kind of looks like a 1980s strip mall on the inside. I'm pretty sure they even have an Orange Julius.
I also got to have dinner with a friend from high school on Monday night. We drank red wine and ate enough that I didn't feel comfortable submitting the receipt to my office for reimbursement afterwards. And as we are both nearly 31 years old, we made it an early night, and I was safely in bed by 11:30 (Eastern). Being lame is completely the best.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Golden Moments
The Golden Globes were tonight! How can you even contain your excitement? Sure, they lacked the drama of last year's press conference, but they featured Rumer Willis as Miss Golden Globes! If you thought her work in The House Bunny was terrific, well, then you probably can't read, so there's really no point in me directly addressing you. But now that I have my entertainment journalist hat on, let me make an awful pun and tell you that Rumer Has It the Golden Globes were terrific!
Okay, to be totally honest we were flipping back and forth between the Globes and our sing along version of High School Musical on DVD. But I think I pretty much got the gist of them. Kate Winslet won twice and somehow managed to seem even less prepared the second time around. Mickey Rourke announced that he wasn't much of a public speaker at the beginning of his speech and proceeded to talk for approximately 4.2 hours. Tina Fey was awesome and hilarious and made an appropriately short speech with lots of jokes per second. Tracy Morgan managed to include the phrase "Get used to it, Cate Blanchett" in the acceptance speech for 30 Rock. Troy and Gabriella almost missed their audition for the Winter Musicale because it was rescheduled for the same time as both the basketball championship game and the academic decathlon. It was truly a magical night.
The Golden Globes were tonight! How can you even contain your excitement? Sure, they lacked the drama of last year's press conference, but they featured Rumer Willis as Miss Golden Globes! If you thought her work in The House Bunny was terrific, well, then you probably can't read, so there's really no point in me directly addressing you. But now that I have my entertainment journalist hat on, let me make an awful pun and tell you that Rumer Has It the Golden Globes were terrific!
Okay, to be totally honest we were flipping back and forth between the Globes and our sing along version of High School Musical on DVD. But I think I pretty much got the gist of them. Kate Winslet won twice and somehow managed to seem even less prepared the second time around. Mickey Rourke announced that he wasn't much of a public speaker at the beginning of his speech and proceeded to talk for approximately 4.2 hours. Tina Fey was awesome and hilarious and made an appropriately short speech with lots of jokes per second. Tracy Morgan managed to include the phrase "Get used to it, Cate Blanchett" in the acceptance speech for 30 Rock. Troy and Gabriella almost missed their audition for the Winter Musicale because it was rescheduled for the same time as both the basketball championship game and the academic decathlon. It was truly a magical night.
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Home & Work
Doesn't it seem like the first week back after the holidays is always the longest one of the year? And more importantly, don't you love it when I open entries with rhetorical questions? This week felt more like four consecutive weeks of spectacular memo writing, conference calling, and client babysitting. I even cleaned my office, and I actually think I may have set a record for the most files sent to storage in one week. You should have seen the records guy's eyes widen with fear.
My sister is in town this weekend, so needless to say there's a lot of On Demand Video watching (it's Beyonce month, thank God) and Connect Four playing going on. The approximately six feet of snow we've received has added to our natural hermiting instincts to the point that we've almost run out of High School Musicals to watch. We've gathered around the fireplace like a family from a Victorian novel, except without the elaborate petticoats and misogyny. It's all quite fetching I assure you.
Doesn't it seem like the first week back after the holidays is always the longest one of the year? And more importantly, don't you love it when I open entries with rhetorical questions? This week felt more like four consecutive weeks of spectacular memo writing, conference calling, and client babysitting. I even cleaned my office, and I actually think I may have set a record for the most files sent to storage in one week. You should have seen the records guy's eyes widen with fear.
My sister is in town this weekend, so needless to say there's a lot of On Demand Video watching (it's Beyonce month, thank God) and Connect Four playing going on. The approximately six feet of snow we've received has added to our natural hermiting instincts to the point that we've almost run out of High School Musicals to watch. We've gathered around the fireplace like a family from a Victorian novel, except without the elaborate petticoats and misogyny. It's all quite fetching I assure you.
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Arts & Culture
Last night we saw The Seafarer at Steppenwolf. I'm still kind of processing how I felt about it. There were lots of Irish accents, which tends to scare the bejesus out of me, and the plot has a bit of a mystical element to it that I'm pretty sure I came up with first when I was in sixth grade. But on the other hand the acting was quite good -- it had Frasier's dad in it -- and it came in at under two and a half hours, including intermission. Fine arts that allow you to get home in time for The Daily Show are definitely a plus in my book.
I also finished Brideshead Revisited the other day, which I really enjoyed. The book itself I enjoyed, not just the finishing thereof. It had a pretty contemporary feel to it even though it was written in the forties, and there was a lot of attractive language. Also I had my parents' edition from the seventies, which had some pretty groovy cover art. My only regret is that it wasn't available in a Classics Illustrated edition. Their sketches for Remembrance of Things Past were totally bitchin.
Last night we saw The Seafarer at Steppenwolf. I'm still kind of processing how I felt about it. There were lots of Irish accents, which tends to scare the bejesus out of me, and the plot has a bit of a mystical element to it that I'm pretty sure I came up with first when I was in sixth grade. But on the other hand the acting was quite good -- it had Frasier's dad in it -- and it came in at under two and a half hours, including intermission. Fine arts that allow you to get home in time for The Daily Show are definitely a plus in my book.
I also finished Brideshead Revisited the other day, which I really enjoyed. The book itself I enjoyed, not just the finishing thereof. It had a pretty contemporary feel to it even though it was written in the forties, and there was a lot of attractive language. Also I had my parents' edition from the seventies, which had some pretty groovy cover art. My only regret is that it wasn't available in a Classics Illustrated edition. Their sketches for Remembrance of Things Past were totally bitchin.
Sunday, January 04, 2009
On the Aisle
Save the Last Dance has been in heavy rotation on cable this weekend. Although I'm sure most people most recall this movie for its gritty depiction of inner-city life, it's also notable as film's most searching portrayal of interracial romance. And while I of course have no problem with couple of different races dating, I have all kinds of problems with anyone at all dating Julia Stiles. She approaches this role with her usual combination of over enunciation and bitch face, with an able assist from the body double whose legs do pretty much all of the dancing. I also think that STLD (as Danceheads like me call it) serves as an excellent primer on the college admissions process; most people really are informed of their Julliard admissions "off the record" immediately after their auditions.
I also got an impromptu review of Tropic Thunder from my parents this weekend. Apparently they rented it on New Year's Eve and found it so unfunny that they "gave up on it" and took it back. Now coming from a woman who will see any movie with a dog in it and actually insisted that Wild Wild West was good, that's quite a statement. There were no real reasons given for the alleged unfunniness, but my guess is that it would have been centered on Jack Black. My mother has never had much tolerance for fat people, even when they're diverting us with their pratfalls.
Save the Last Dance has been in heavy rotation on cable this weekend. Although I'm sure most people most recall this movie for its gritty depiction of inner-city life, it's also notable as film's most searching portrayal of interracial romance. And while I of course have no problem with couple of different races dating, I have all kinds of problems with anyone at all dating Julia Stiles. She approaches this role with her usual combination of over enunciation and bitch face, with an able assist from the body double whose legs do pretty much all of the dancing. I also think that STLD (as Danceheads like me call it) serves as an excellent primer on the college admissions process; most people really are informed of their Julliard admissions "off the record" immediately after their auditions.
I also got an impromptu review of Tropic Thunder from my parents this weekend. Apparently they rented it on New Year's Eve and found it so unfunny that they "gave up on it" and took it back. Now coming from a woman who will see any movie with a dog in it and actually insisted that Wild Wild West was good, that's quite a statement. There were no real reasons given for the alleged unfunniness, but my guess is that it would have been centered on Jack Black. My mother has never had much tolerance for fat people, even when they're diverting us with their pratfalls.
Thursday, January 01, 2009
New Year's Resolutions 2009
-- Eat own weight in KFC Original Recipe.
-- Lose 50 pounds.
-- Curb unhealthy obsession with Amanda Bynes.
-- Finally come to grips with tragic personal history of something or other.
-- Write letter to editor re: dirty episode of The Ghost Whisperer.
-- Limit self to one date rape per month.
-- Rationalize existence of Tyler Perry's Meet the Browns.
-- Get criminal record expunged of tragic "Bea Arthur incident."
-- Develop a safe, energy-independent version of the McGriddle.
-- Begin tempestuous fake romance with Lauren Conrad.
-- Star in shot-for-shot remake of Robin Williams' classic RV.
-- Obtain full refund for purchase of Illinois Senate seat.
-- Mathematically prove existence of God.
-- Get back into life with Depends.
-- Eat own weight in KFC Original Recipe.
-- Lose 50 pounds.
-- Curb unhealthy obsession with Amanda Bynes.
-- Finally come to grips with tragic personal history of something or other.
-- Write letter to editor re: dirty episode of The Ghost Whisperer.
-- Limit self to one date rape per month.
-- Rationalize existence of Tyler Perry's Meet the Browns.
-- Get criminal record expunged of tragic "Bea Arthur incident."
-- Develop a safe, energy-independent version of the McGriddle.
-- Begin tempestuous fake romance with Lauren Conrad.
-- Star in shot-for-shot remake of Robin Williams' classic RV.
-- Obtain full refund for purchase of Illinois Senate seat.
-- Mathematically prove existence of God.
-- Get back into life with Depends.
