Thursday, January 01, 2009
New Year's Resolutions 2009
-- Eat own weight in KFC Original Recipe.
-- Lose 50 pounds.
-- Curb unhealthy obsession with Amanda Bynes.
-- Finally come to grips with tragic personal history of something or other.
-- Write letter to editor re: dirty episode of The Ghost Whisperer.
-- Limit self to one date rape per month.
-- Rationalize existence of Tyler Perry's Meet the Browns.
-- Get criminal record expunged of tragic "Bea Arthur incident."
-- Develop a safe, energy-independent version of the McGriddle.
-- Begin tempestuous fake romance with Lauren Conrad.
-- Star in shot-for-shot remake of Robin Williams' classic RV.
-- Obtain full refund for purchase of Illinois Senate seat.
-- Mathematically prove existence of God.
-- Get back into life with Depends.
-- Eat own weight in KFC Original Recipe.
-- Lose 50 pounds.
-- Curb unhealthy obsession with Amanda Bynes.
-- Finally come to grips with tragic personal history of something or other.
-- Write letter to editor re: dirty episode of The Ghost Whisperer.
-- Limit self to one date rape per month.
-- Rationalize existence of Tyler Perry's Meet the Browns.
-- Get criminal record expunged of tragic "Bea Arthur incident."
-- Develop a safe, energy-independent version of the McGriddle.
-- Begin tempestuous fake romance with Lauren Conrad.
-- Star in shot-for-shot remake of Robin Williams' classic RV.
-- Obtain full refund for purchase of Illinois Senate seat.
-- Mathematically prove existence of God.
-- Get back into life with Depends.
