Monday, May 09, 2005
Bulletin Board
-- Athleticism. Yesterday I went for an extra long run and I think I may now be permanently disabled. Seriously, when I sit down I have to ease into the chair like a pregnant woman. A pregnant woman with rickets.
-- People Magazine's Most Beautiful People. Julia Roberts is pretty? Stop the presses! I think they ought to inject some controversy into the whole thing by selecting celebrities who have suffered deformities or really let themselves go. Tobey Maguire, call your agent!
-- Desperate Housewives. Remember when interesting things used to happen on this show? I mean, besides Marcia Cross's insane facial expressions? I think it's time for another murder. I'm looking at you, Teri.
-- Spirituality. I actually fell asleep during the sermon at my church yesterday. I dreamed that I was eating a burrito. It was the most delicious mass ever.
-- High Art. There's an installation at the MCA that contrasts images from Iraq with hardcore porn. I guess that's one way to get young people interested in the arts. Now if only they can somehow incorporate masturbation into the symphony.
-- Athleticism. Yesterday I went for an extra long run and I think I may now be permanently disabled. Seriously, when I sit down I have to ease into the chair like a pregnant woman. A pregnant woman with rickets.
-- People Magazine's Most Beautiful People. Julia Roberts is pretty? Stop the presses! I think they ought to inject some controversy into the whole thing by selecting celebrities who have suffered deformities or really let themselves go. Tobey Maguire, call your agent!
-- Desperate Housewives. Remember when interesting things used to happen on this show? I mean, besides Marcia Cross's insane facial expressions? I think it's time for another murder. I'm looking at you, Teri.
-- Spirituality. I actually fell asleep during the sermon at my church yesterday. I dreamed that I was eating a burrito. It was the most delicious mass ever.
-- High Art. There's an installation at the MCA that contrasts images from Iraq with hardcore porn. I guess that's one way to get young people interested in the arts. Now if only they can somehow incorporate masturbation into the symphony.
