Wednesday, October 05, 2005
So Glad We Had This Chat
I am not one of those people who enjoys making extended small talk with strangers. Don't get me wrong; I love meeting new people, but when it comes to paying for my groceries or opening a checking account or having blood drawn, I tend to be more focused on the business aspect of things. I don't need to tell my life story (that's what this place is for!) and I don't need to listen to a fifteen minute analysis of Chicago's wacky weather patterns. I'm not saying performing life's little mundane tasks needs to be unpleasant, I'm just saying that people should just give me my damn change and get on with their lives. I didn't come to Chipotle because I wanted to make a new best friend.
I mention all of this because last night I had a cabdriver who couldn't read my oh-so-subtle signs of not wanting to be in a conversation (such as acting distracted, playing with my phone, and eventually even taking out a book), and the following dialogue ensued:
Driver: So, you big time lawyer?
Me: Uh, well, I'm an attorney, yeah. I'm not sure about "big time."
Driver: Oh sure, you hot shot lawyer, make big money.
Me: (laughing weakly) Right, well someone should tell my boss that.
Driver: Bet all the girls love you with your big money.
Me: (more fake laughter) I don't know about that.
Driver: Sure, you can pick up girls easy if you got the money. What bars you like to go to?
Me: Oh, I don't know, lots of different places.
Driver: So many beautiful girls.
Me: Uh huh.
Driver: Just be careful, because some of those girls, they see big time lawyer like you and they decide they going to get pregnant.
And scene. The "conversation" then continued to cover my future career plans, the weather (natch), and the immigration status of a number of people I've never met. I think I've just got to start acting visibly insane; not only would people shun me, but they might also give me quarters.
I am not one of those people who enjoys making extended small talk with strangers. Don't get me wrong; I love meeting new people, but when it comes to paying for my groceries or opening a checking account or having blood drawn, I tend to be more focused on the business aspect of things. I don't need to tell my life story (that's what this place is for!) and I don't need to listen to a fifteen minute analysis of Chicago's wacky weather patterns. I'm not saying performing life's little mundane tasks needs to be unpleasant, I'm just saying that people should just give me my damn change and get on with their lives. I didn't come to Chipotle because I wanted to make a new best friend.
I mention all of this because last night I had a cabdriver who couldn't read my oh-so-subtle signs of not wanting to be in a conversation (such as acting distracted, playing with my phone, and eventually even taking out a book), and the following dialogue ensued:
Driver: So, you big time lawyer?
Me: Uh, well, I'm an attorney, yeah. I'm not sure about "big time."
Driver: Oh sure, you hot shot lawyer, make big money.
Me: (laughing weakly) Right, well someone should tell my boss that.
Driver: Bet all the girls love you with your big money.
Me: (more fake laughter) I don't know about that.
Driver: Sure, you can pick up girls easy if you got the money. What bars you like to go to?
Me: Oh, I don't know, lots of different places.
Driver: So many beautiful girls.
Me: Uh huh.
Driver: Just be careful, because some of those girls, they see big time lawyer like you and they decide they going to get pregnant.
And scene. The "conversation" then continued to cover my future career plans, the weather (natch), and the immigration status of a number of people I've never met. I think I've just got to start acting visibly insane; not only would people shun me, but they might also give me quarters.
