Wednesday, December 07, 2005
Book Group
I have to finish reading "The Fountainhead" as soon as humanly possible, if only so people will stop asking me questions about it. You see, it's such an enormous book that I can't fit it into my bag, and have to carry it all over town clutched to my bosom like a 14-year-old girl with a copy of The Baby-sitters Club #42: Jessi and the Dance School Phantom. This, in and of itself, is annoying but not all that uncommon; last year I nearly got carpal tunnel hauling Gravity's Rainbow up and down the Brown Line for two months. But no book has ever instigated quite as much unwanted conversation as this one:
"Oh, Ayn Rand, eh? What do you think of her philosophy? You know, objectivism?"
I think you probably know exactly two things about Ayn Rand: A) that she has a philosophy, and B) that it's called objectivism. And I'm guessing you learned those from watching The Simpsons.
"Doing a little bit of light reading, are you? Got it all figured out yet?"
The only thing I've "figured out" is that I'm about as likely to draw my life's philosophy from The Fountainhead as from Danielle Steele's "Secrets."
"Isn't Ayn Rand the best?"
Well, it depends. The best what? Because I hear as a gynecologist she's barely sub-par.
"Man, haven't you finished that book yet?"
Yes. Yes, I have. Now I'm only carrying it around so that I can force you to eat it page by page. Don't worry, it will only taste slightly worse than Cool Ranch Doritos.
Thank you, Ms. Rand. You've gotten the public excited about reading again. Or at least about harassing the people who are excited about reading.
I have to finish reading "The Fountainhead" as soon as humanly possible, if only so people will stop asking me questions about it. You see, it's such an enormous book that I can't fit it into my bag, and have to carry it all over town clutched to my bosom like a 14-year-old girl with a copy of The Baby-sitters Club #42: Jessi and the Dance School Phantom. This, in and of itself, is annoying but not all that uncommon; last year I nearly got carpal tunnel hauling Gravity's Rainbow up and down the Brown Line for two months. But no book has ever instigated quite as much unwanted conversation as this one:
"Oh, Ayn Rand, eh? What do you think of her philosophy? You know, objectivism?"
I think you probably know exactly two things about Ayn Rand: A) that she has a philosophy, and B) that it's called objectivism. And I'm guessing you learned those from watching The Simpsons.
"Doing a little bit of light reading, are you? Got it all figured out yet?"
The only thing I've "figured out" is that I'm about as likely to draw my life's philosophy from The Fountainhead as from Danielle Steele's "Secrets."
"Isn't Ayn Rand the best?"
Well, it depends. The best what? Because I hear as a gynecologist she's barely sub-par.
"Man, haven't you finished that book yet?"
Yes. Yes, I have. Now I'm only carrying it around so that I can force you to eat it page by page. Don't worry, it will only taste slightly worse than Cool Ranch Doritos.
Thank you, Ms. Rand. You've gotten the public excited about reading again. Or at least about harassing the people who are excited about reading.
