Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Many Amazing Excuses for Missing Father's Day
-- Trapped in a well.
-- Sports Illustrated falsely assured you the football phone would be delivered on time.
-- Cold and distant relationship.
-- Your father is Woody Allen, so you always give combined Father's Day/Anniversary gifts.
-- Spray paint on macaroni necklace was still drying.
-- J.C. Penney was all out of horrific ties.
-- Thought that Tad was your father your whole life; turns out it was really his evil twin Ted. (For soap opera characters only.)
-- Always get it confused with Boxing Day.
-- Sending a gift would actually violate the terms of the settlement.
-- Oprah was on.
-- Picking out hats all day.
-- Too busy bringing unsolicited freedom to the Iraqi people.
-- Too busy bringing unsolicited freedom to Britney Spears.
-- Lost in George Clooney's eyes.
-- Trapped in a well.
-- Sports Illustrated falsely assured you the football phone would be delivered on time.
-- Cold and distant relationship.
-- Your father is Woody Allen, so you always give combined Father's Day/Anniversary gifts.
-- Spray paint on macaroni necklace was still drying.
-- J.C. Penney was all out of horrific ties.
-- Thought that Tad was your father your whole life; turns out it was really his evil twin Ted. (For soap opera characters only.)
-- Always get it confused with Boxing Day.
-- Sending a gift would actually violate the terms of the settlement.
-- Oprah was on.
-- Picking out hats all day.
-- Too busy bringing unsolicited freedom to the Iraqi people.
-- Too busy bringing unsolicited freedom to Britney Spears.
-- Lost in George Clooney's eyes.
