Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Notes from the Rain Forest
The sun has not been out here in four days now. This has had some strange effects. For instance, I now have rickets. And I have developed a set of gill slits on my neck. I only use them to store office supplies at present, but still, they're there. It's really not a bad look.
No, the only actual impact of the recent onset of ark-building season has been my bizarre emotional state. Whenever there's no sun I start questioning all the decisions I've made in my life, wondering whether I maybe should have had the chicken instead of the fish or if tight rolled jeans really looked good on me. I consider how my life would be different if I were a diamond miner and what kind of relationship I could have had with Urkel if I had just seized the day that time at the Old Orchard Mall. Ahhh, the road not taken.
Oh, and I've delayed taking my dry cleaning in yet another week. Pretty soon I'll be down to wearing my "My Other Car is Oprah" t-shirt and the Austin Powers costume I thought was hilarious when I was in college.
The sun has not been out here in four days now. This has had some strange effects. For instance, I now have rickets. And I have developed a set of gill slits on my neck. I only use them to store office supplies at present, but still, they're there. It's really not a bad look.
No, the only actual impact of the recent onset of ark-building season has been my bizarre emotional state. Whenever there's no sun I start questioning all the decisions I've made in my life, wondering whether I maybe should have had the chicken instead of the fish or if tight rolled jeans really looked good on me. I consider how my life would be different if I were a diamond miner and what kind of relationship I could have had with Urkel if I had just seized the day that time at the Old Orchard Mall. Ahhh, the road not taken.
Oh, and I've delayed taking my dry cleaning in yet another week. Pretty soon I'll be down to wearing my "My Other Car is Oprah" t-shirt and the Austin Powers costume I thought was hilarious when I was in college.
