Saturday, May 05, 2007
How Are Americans Celebrating Cinco de Mayo?
-- Not realizing that it is, in fact, Cinco de Mayo.
-- Vomiting up margaritas in the bathroom of a T.G.I. Friday's.
-- Enjoying the excuse to finally wear that sombrero.
-- Substituting pictures of Salma Hayek for typical, non-diverse masturbatory material.
-- Date raping a pi phi.
-- Developing a complex relationship with Jose Cuervo.
-- Feeling bad about continuing to loathe Mariachi music.
-- Wondering why pinatas never caught on for, say, Easter or Rosh Hashana.
-- Understanding not one second of Telemundo.
-- Watching Cycle Two of America's Next Top Model.
-- Delaying vote on proposition legalizing the sterilization of all immigrants.
-- Not realizing that it is, in fact, Cinco de Mayo.
-- Vomiting up margaritas in the bathroom of a T.G.I. Friday's.
-- Enjoying the excuse to finally wear that sombrero.
-- Substituting pictures of Salma Hayek for typical, non-diverse masturbatory material.
-- Date raping a pi phi.
-- Developing a complex relationship with Jose Cuervo.
-- Feeling bad about continuing to loathe Mariachi music.
-- Wondering why pinatas never caught on for, say, Easter or Rosh Hashana.
-- Understanding not one second of Telemundo.
-- Watching Cycle Two of America's Next Top Model.
-- Delaying vote on proposition legalizing the sterilization of all immigrants.
