Sunday, May 31, 2009
Better Homes & Gardens
We have a tiny, tiny strip of land in front of our condo building. It is possibly three feet wide. Its most notable feature is a hatch for some sort of utility. I think the reaction most people have to it is not even noticing it is there. And yet recently it became the center of a very heated debate among my four-member condo association.
You see, grass will not grow on this yardlet. My guess is that it is America's Tiniest Ancient Indian Burial Ground, but it could possibly be because of the continual Cubs traffic through this area. But whatever the reason, three attempts at resodding have yielded no results. We have only a lovely display of crabgrass and ragweed to show for our efforts.
The subject of how to handle "the strip" has been hotly contested. One neighbor wanted to just cover it with lava rock, Chicago's official method of demonstrating horticultural defeat. Another neighbor wanted to dress it up with all manner of lawn gnomes, pink flamingos, and topiary sculptures of Carrie Bradshaw. As the peacemaker, I ended up suggesting wood chips and a few plants. This somehow left me with the task of procuring these items.
So three trips to Home Depot and about $150 later, we have a new front lawn. It turns out I am not super awesome at digging up weeds, but what I lack in skill I more than make up for with willingness to cause myself traumatic injury. May the neighborhood pets happily piss there for many years to come.
We have a tiny, tiny strip of land in front of our condo building. It is possibly three feet wide. Its most notable feature is a hatch for some sort of utility. I think the reaction most people have to it is not even noticing it is there. And yet recently it became the center of a very heated debate among my four-member condo association.
You see, grass will not grow on this yardlet. My guess is that it is America's Tiniest Ancient Indian Burial Ground, but it could possibly be because of the continual Cubs traffic through this area. But whatever the reason, three attempts at resodding have yielded no results. We have only a lovely display of crabgrass and ragweed to show for our efforts.
The subject of how to handle "the strip" has been hotly contested. One neighbor wanted to just cover it with lava rock, Chicago's official method of demonstrating horticultural defeat. Another neighbor wanted to dress it up with all manner of lawn gnomes, pink flamingos, and topiary sculptures of Carrie Bradshaw. As the peacemaker, I ended up suggesting wood chips and a few plants. This somehow left me with the task of procuring these items.
So three trips to Home Depot and about $150 later, we have a new front lawn. It turns out I am not super awesome at digging up weeds, but what I lack in skill I more than make up for with willingness to cause myself traumatic injury. May the neighborhood pets happily piss there for many years to come.
