Tuesday, December 01, 2009
Overtaken
Let me preface everything I am about to say with a disclaimer that I do not, in fact, watch Tabatha's Salon Takeover. There is no season pass for it on my DVR, nor do collections of the Takeover on DVD adorn my shelves. I have no idea who Tabatha is apart from the obvious facts that she has some sort of involvement in the greater hair industry and that she has what is in my view a dearth of eyebrows. I just happen to have seen the show every now and then when there is nothing else on.
(One might wonder why exactly it is that a man who has in the past freely admitted to a certain level of viewership of the Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency would balk at an association with even the least socially acceptable of Bravo reality shows, but that is a separate question.)
But from even the terribly casual viewing I have given the show I can tell you that it is pretty much always the same. Some tragically overwhelmed salon owner or other entrusts his facilities and stable of wacky hairdressers to a severe and frightening lady and much crying and screaming ensues before an eventual outbreak of hugging and learning. Oh, and they give the salon a makeover, which they commence by dramatically (yet generally ineffectively) swinging a sledgehammer around.
This makes me think very much that I would very much like Tabatha to take over my place of business. No, she's not to my knowledge a licensed attorney, but I still think her talents for identifying bad dye jobs and making acid remarks about people's bad attitudes would come in handy. She could sit my secretary down and explain to her that answering the phone is in fact part of the job description. She could even padlock the break room to make an important point about constant snacking in the workplace, if she wanted.
Why I am not yet a high level network executive I will never know.
Let me preface everything I am about to say with a disclaimer that I do not, in fact, watch Tabatha's Salon Takeover. There is no season pass for it on my DVR, nor do collections of the Takeover on DVD adorn my shelves. I have no idea who Tabatha is apart from the obvious facts that she has some sort of involvement in the greater hair industry and that she has what is in my view a dearth of eyebrows. I just happen to have seen the show every now and then when there is nothing else on.
(One might wonder why exactly it is that a man who has in the past freely admitted to a certain level of viewership of the Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency would balk at an association with even the least socially acceptable of Bravo reality shows, but that is a separate question.)
But from even the terribly casual viewing I have given the show I can tell you that it is pretty much always the same. Some tragically overwhelmed salon owner or other entrusts his facilities and stable of wacky hairdressers to a severe and frightening lady and much crying and screaming ensues before an eventual outbreak of hugging and learning. Oh, and they give the salon a makeover, which they commence by dramatically (yet generally ineffectively) swinging a sledgehammer around.
This makes me think very much that I would very much like Tabatha to take over my place of business. No, she's not to my knowledge a licensed attorney, but I still think her talents for identifying bad dye jobs and making acid remarks about people's bad attitudes would come in handy. She could sit my secretary down and explain to her that answering the phone is in fact part of the job description. She could even padlock the break room to make an important point about constant snacking in the workplace, if she wanted.
Why I am not yet a high level network executive I will never know.
