Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Trials and Tribulations
I don't think I've mentioned that I'm going to trial next week. No, not for my many, many sex crimes, but on behalf of a pro bono client with a civil claim. It's sort of exciting because trials are like unicorns, very rare and beautiful. It's also kind of a pain in my ass, because it involves a ton of work, none of which is billable. I have spent most of the past three weekends on it, along with Martin Luther King day and last night until 10:30. And last night I had a dream about authenticating documents for it. Which was not nearly as exciting as the dream I had Friday where Rihanna worked at my law firm and was not very well liked by the partnership.
Anyway, I've now written jury instructions, which are sort of like the instructions for your DVD player, only more boring. And I've written direct examinations for my witnesses, about which there is absolutely nothing direct. I also wrote some jury selection questions, although those were seriously hampered when I found out we're not technically supposed to ask about Jersey Shore. Who comes up with these rules, anyway?
So yeah, I'm going to Champaign-Urbana on Sunday for this grand affair. Since I went to law school there, I'm thinking of this as sort of a triumphant return. Perhaps I'll go binge eat and have an emotional breakdown in the lobby, just for old time's sake.
I don't think I've mentioned that I'm going to trial next week. No, not for my many, many sex crimes, but on behalf of a pro bono client with a civil claim. It's sort of exciting because trials are like unicorns, very rare and beautiful. It's also kind of a pain in my ass, because it involves a ton of work, none of which is billable. I have spent most of the past three weekends on it, along with Martin Luther King day and last night until 10:30. And last night I had a dream about authenticating documents for it. Which was not nearly as exciting as the dream I had Friday where Rihanna worked at my law firm and was not very well liked by the partnership.
Anyway, I've now written jury instructions, which are sort of like the instructions for your DVD player, only more boring. And I've written direct examinations for my witnesses, about which there is absolutely nothing direct. I also wrote some jury selection questions, although those were seriously hampered when I found out we're not technically supposed to ask about Jersey Shore. Who comes up with these rules, anyway?
So yeah, I'm going to Champaign-Urbana on Sunday for this grand affair. Since I went to law school there, I'm thinking of this as sort of a triumphant return. Perhaps I'll go binge eat and have an emotional breakdown in the lobby, just for old time's sake.
