Thursday, April 15, 2010
Trailer Park
One of my favorite cultural barometers has always been watching previews at the movies. By observing the reactions of those around me to, say, the Big Momma's House 2 trailer, I am able to gauge exactly how far it is that civilization has declined. Judging from the most recent round, we should be descending back into the primordial ooze any second now.
First there was the Sex & the City 2 trailer. When Carrie emerged from her penthouse, shook her luxurious mane, and neighed merrily, there was applause. When Samantha made her first genital-related pun, there was uproarious laughter. And when Aiden appeared, there were shocked gasps. And a little bit of gagging, from me.
Then we had a trailer for The A Team, which looks like it's going to be the best movie ever made based on a TV show I used to try to skip Cub Scouts for (since there's no ALF movie, yet). Mainly it was just ninety seconds of explosions, but the audience reacted as though it was Schindler's List 2: Listier.
There was also a trailer for some monstrosity with the sleepy-eyed girl from Mean Girls. It appeared to be about old people getting it on. Getting it on in Italy, I think. It definitely would have benefited from some Gretchen Weiners. But at the end, I hear the pre-teen next to me lean over to her friend and say "we're definitely seeing this one."
On second thought, maybe all of this is another good reason to stay home.
One of my favorite cultural barometers has always been watching previews at the movies. By observing the reactions of those around me to, say, the Big Momma's House 2 trailer, I am able to gauge exactly how far it is that civilization has declined. Judging from the most recent round, we should be descending back into the primordial ooze any second now.
First there was the Sex & the City 2 trailer. When Carrie emerged from her penthouse, shook her luxurious mane, and neighed merrily, there was applause. When Samantha made her first genital-related pun, there was uproarious laughter. And when Aiden appeared, there were shocked gasps. And a little bit of gagging, from me.
Then we had a trailer for The A Team, which looks like it's going to be the best movie ever made based on a TV show I used to try to skip Cub Scouts for (since there's no ALF movie, yet). Mainly it was just ninety seconds of explosions, but the audience reacted as though it was Schindler's List 2: Listier.
There was also a trailer for some monstrosity with the sleepy-eyed girl from Mean Girls. It appeared to be about old people getting it on. Getting it on in Italy, I think. It definitely would have benefited from some Gretchen Weiners. But at the end, I hear the pre-teen next to me lean over to her friend and say "we're definitely seeing this one."
On second thought, maybe all of this is another good reason to stay home.
