Thursday, September 23, 2010
The Big Top
Well, another season of Top Model is upon us, and they've really raised their game this year. Of the 14 contestants, I'd say at least nine are horribly misshapen in some way. Tyra is redefining our notions of beauty all over the damn place. There's one who is approximately twelve feet tall with a five-inch waist and an interest in Dungeons & Dragons to match. There's one who has size G breasts and eyebrows she surely must tweeze with salad tongs. There's one who looks like Maggie Gyllenhaal. And then there were the makeovers. As usual, Tyra punished the few prettyish girls with terrible haircuts. One girl got a bright red bowl cut. One girl got brown hair and white eyebrows. The horror, the horror.
The photo shoots have honestly sort of been snoozes so far. I mean, fallen angels? Teen bullying with Demi Lovato? With Demi Lovato? I'm not even sure she's real. Things were way better back when she was dressing them up like their childhood photos or dunking them in water. I miss the aspect of cruelty, frankly. The psychological cruelty just isn't enough.
Well, another season of Top Model is upon us, and they've really raised their game this year. Of the 14 contestants, I'd say at least nine are horribly misshapen in some way. Tyra is redefining our notions of beauty all over the damn place. There's one who is approximately twelve feet tall with a five-inch waist and an interest in Dungeons & Dragons to match. There's one who has size G breasts and eyebrows she surely must tweeze with salad tongs. There's one who looks like Maggie Gyllenhaal. And then there were the makeovers. As usual, Tyra punished the few prettyish girls with terrible haircuts. One girl got a bright red bowl cut. One girl got brown hair and white eyebrows. The horror, the horror.
The photo shoots have honestly sort of been snoozes so far. I mean, fallen angels? Teen bullying with Demi Lovato? With Demi Lovato? I'm not even sure she's real. Things were way better back when she was dressing them up like their childhood photos or dunking them in water. I miss the aspect of cruelty, frankly. The psychological cruelty just isn't enough.
