Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Taxing
Have I mentioned my epic tax battle? I have spent the past six months attempting to explain basic tax law to the IRS. Or, rather, my accountant/lawyer has spent the past six months attempting to explain it to both me and the IRS. Apparently, there is a certain minuscule portion of the American public that gets audited completely at random. Apparently, I am lucky enough to be part of that minuscule portion. And apparently, they assign brand new agents with no experience with tax or law to handle those cases. Or so they tell me. Again, I've hired a guy to deal with this. Because spending six hours down at the federal building going through my receipts on a Thursday in July is not my idea of a good time. But then again, watching old episodes of What I Like About You on Teen Nick is my idea of a good time, so my judgment may not be unimpeachable.
Anyway, it appears that my tax adventures may be coming to a close soon. My accountant/lawyer has reached an accord with Big Brother and I will be cutting a small check to him as opposed to a large one to the feds. I haven't checked all of the fine print yet, though. It wouldn't surprise me if I were required to perform manual labor or go through an elaborate public shaming ritual. Which is fine, because my whole life is essentially an elaborate public shaming ritual. Such very good times.
Have I mentioned my epic tax battle? I have spent the past six months attempting to explain basic tax law to the IRS. Or, rather, my accountant/lawyer has spent the past six months attempting to explain it to both me and the IRS. Apparently, there is a certain minuscule portion of the American public that gets audited completely at random. Apparently, I am lucky enough to be part of that minuscule portion. And apparently, they assign brand new agents with no experience with tax or law to handle those cases. Or so they tell me. Again, I've hired a guy to deal with this. Because spending six hours down at the federal building going through my receipts on a Thursday in July is not my idea of a good time. But then again, watching old episodes of What I Like About You on Teen Nick is my idea of a good time, so my judgment may not be unimpeachable.
Anyway, it appears that my tax adventures may be coming to a close soon. My accountant/lawyer has reached an accord with Big Brother and I will be cutting a small check to him as opposed to a large one to the feds. I haven't checked all of the fine print yet, though. It wouldn't surprise me if I were required to perform manual labor or go through an elaborate public shaming ritual. Which is fine, because my whole life is essentially an elaborate public shaming ritual. Such very good times.
