Tuesday, December 21, 2010
What Are Our Holiday Plans?
-- Lurking in bushes, sharpening knife.
-- Creating three-foot "zone of mistletoe" around body.
-- Finding lovely last-minute gifts like toothpaste and athletic socks at the CVS.
-- Dressing our dachshunds in miniature elf costumes.
-- Smiling and nodding at elderly relatives' ramblings about the '40s.
-- Sending Christmas cards to the surviving cast members of Designing Women.
-- Trying to act knowledgeable about Hanukkah.
-- Being visited by three spirits, two of which are vodka.
-- Getting nasty looks from Salvation Army bell ringers.
-- Wearing a variety of sassy hats.
-- Sobbing all the way through the Spongebob Squarepants holiday special.
-- Complaining about things not being in 3D.
-- Immediately breaking or losing parts of our new toys.
-- Dying on the inside.
-- Snickering at the term "stocking stuffer."
-- Being born to die for the sins of humanity.
-- Lurking in bushes, sharpening knife.
-- Creating three-foot "zone of mistletoe" around body.
-- Finding lovely last-minute gifts like toothpaste and athletic socks at the CVS.
-- Dressing our dachshunds in miniature elf costumes.
-- Smiling and nodding at elderly relatives' ramblings about the '40s.
-- Sending Christmas cards to the surviving cast members of Designing Women.
-- Trying to act knowledgeable about Hanukkah.
-- Being visited by three spirits, two of which are vodka.
-- Getting nasty looks from Salvation Army bell ringers.
-- Wearing a variety of sassy hats.
-- Sobbing all the way through the Spongebob Squarepants holiday special.
-- Complaining about things not being in 3D.
-- Immediately breaking or losing parts of our new toys.
-- Dying on the inside.
-- Snickering at the term "stocking stuffer."
-- Being born to die for the sins of humanity.
