Friday, February 25, 2011
Oscar Predictions 2011
Is it weird that I'm betting on Norbit to take the whole thing? I mean, I know it came out like four years ago, but damn is that Eddie Murphy hilarious. If there's one thing Oscar loves, it's a comedy. And if there's two things Oscar loves, it's a comedy and black people. That's why Tyler Perry has won best director fifteen times.
But really, I'm thinking The King's Speech will probably win, because British accents make everything sound really classy and artistic. Look at Helena Bonham Carter. Essentially she's a crazy homeless person, but her accent makes her sound like a damned genius. It could be The Social Network, but it seems like people have moved on from it now, kind of like Myspace.
For best director, I'm hoping for David Fincher, mainly because he fulfilled the American Dream and put Gwyneth Paltrow's head in a box, but it could be that dude who directed The King's Speech, even though this is the first time most people have ever even heard of him. I don't know, flip a coin.
Best actress will be Natalie Portman, but shockingly enough, not for her work in Black Swan. It will be a lifetime achievement award for No Strings Attached, Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium, and that movie where she lived in a Wal-Mart. And she will kick Annette Bening in the crotch as she heads up to receive it.
Colin Firth will be best actor, unless he is somehow hit by a meteor between now and Sunday. Actually, even then he would still win, but they would send Amanda Bynes to pick it up on his behalf. Since she played his daughter in What a Girl Wants and all. That would lead to some hilarious pratfalls, let me tell you.
Part II tomorrow, assuming I don't forget about this entirely...
Is it weird that I'm betting on Norbit to take the whole thing? I mean, I know it came out like four years ago, but damn is that Eddie Murphy hilarious. If there's one thing Oscar loves, it's a comedy. And if there's two things Oscar loves, it's a comedy and black people. That's why Tyler Perry has won best director fifteen times.
But really, I'm thinking The King's Speech will probably win, because British accents make everything sound really classy and artistic. Look at Helena Bonham Carter. Essentially she's a crazy homeless person, but her accent makes her sound like a damned genius. It could be The Social Network, but it seems like people have moved on from it now, kind of like Myspace.
For best director, I'm hoping for David Fincher, mainly because he fulfilled the American Dream and put Gwyneth Paltrow's head in a box, but it could be that dude who directed The King's Speech, even though this is the first time most people have ever even heard of him. I don't know, flip a coin.
Best actress will be Natalie Portman, but shockingly enough, not for her work in Black Swan. It will be a lifetime achievement award for No Strings Attached, Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium, and that movie where she lived in a Wal-Mart. And she will kick Annette Bening in the crotch as she heads up to receive it.
Colin Firth will be best actor, unless he is somehow hit by a meteor between now and Sunday. Actually, even then he would still win, but they would send Amanda Bynes to pick it up on his behalf. Since she played his daughter in What a Girl Wants and all. That would lead to some hilarious pratfalls, let me tell you.
Part II tomorrow, assuming I don't forget about this entirely...
