Thursday, March 15, 2012
In Transit
So it took me an hour to travel the approximately 6 miles to work this morning. There was a train arriving just as I got to the station, which made me feel like I was all kinds of lucky, but that turned out to be dead wrong. That train ended up stopping every two minutes or so, ostensibly to suffer techinical difficulties, but I'm pretty convinced it was really so the operator could enjoy repeatedly throwing me into the backside of the rather hefty gentleman standing to my right. Of course, after our first stop the train was so full of people it was essentially human Tetris from there on out, so there was no shortage of bumping into people to go around.
The best part of the trip, though, was the extra sass our operator brought to the proceedings. At each and every stop she made sure to lecture people on the platform about how rude they were being by trying to push their way onto the train. She actually singled people out, saying things like "sir, you need to get your arms out of the door, because I'm waiting on you now so I can close it" and "mam, there are three trains directly behind me now, you can just wait for one of those, okay?" I was a little disappointed that I wasn't eligible for this sort of life coaching, but one can't have everything, I guess. Unless you're Angelina Jolie. That bitch really does have it all.
So it took me an hour to travel the approximately 6 miles to work this morning. There was a train arriving just as I got to the station, which made me feel like I was all kinds of lucky, but that turned out to be dead wrong. That train ended up stopping every two minutes or so, ostensibly to suffer techinical difficulties, but I'm pretty convinced it was really so the operator could enjoy repeatedly throwing me into the backside of the rather hefty gentleman standing to my right. Of course, after our first stop the train was so full of people it was essentially human Tetris from there on out, so there was no shortage of bumping into people to go around.
The best part of the trip, though, was the extra sass our operator brought to the proceedings. At each and every stop she made sure to lecture people on the platform about how rude they were being by trying to push their way onto the train. She actually singled people out, saying things like "sir, you need to get your arms out of the door, because I'm waiting on you now so I can close it" and "mam, there are three trains directly behind me now, you can just wait for one of those, okay?" I was a little disappointed that I wasn't eligible for this sort of life coaching, but one can't have everything, I guess. Unless you're Angelina Jolie. That bitch really does have it all.
