Friday, December 27, 2013
And the Pivot to the New Year Begins
As someone who, thanks to my parents, endured the holiday marathons of both Monk and Psych, I can tell you that TV programming as we approach Christmas becomes more and more concentrated on programs involving Santa or the Baby Jesus or Mariah Carey in a fur-fringed tube top. The day after Christmas, though, this immediately stops. Reruns of Law & Order return to their primacy in the majority of the cable world. News networks shift from human interest stories and coverage of the fact that people are shopping back to the usual wars and political shouting. I'm pretty sure the Hallmark Movie Channel just shows dead air for forty-eight hours.
But the good news is that recapping the year and counting things down is good for pretty much all of December. And indeed it will go into high gear for the next few days. So in that spirit, here are my top ten movies that were not released in 2013 for 2013:
10. Big Momma's House 2
9. Willow
8. All About Steve (Director's Cut)
7. From Justin to Kelly
6. Return of the Jedi (Ewok portions only)
5. Mother May I Sleep With Danger
4. She's the Man (portions that foreshadow Amanda Bynes' decline into madness only)
3. Jetsons: The Movie
2. JAG (if it were a movie)
1. Citizen Kane
More end of year fun undoubtedly to follow!
As someone who, thanks to my parents, endured the holiday marathons of both Monk and Psych, I can tell you that TV programming as we approach Christmas becomes more and more concentrated on programs involving Santa or the Baby Jesus or Mariah Carey in a fur-fringed tube top. The day after Christmas, though, this immediately stops. Reruns of Law & Order return to their primacy in the majority of the cable world. News networks shift from human interest stories and coverage of the fact that people are shopping back to the usual wars and political shouting. I'm pretty sure the Hallmark Movie Channel just shows dead air for forty-eight hours.
But the good news is that recapping the year and counting things down is good for pretty much all of December. And indeed it will go into high gear for the next few days. So in that spirit, here are my top ten movies that were not released in 2013 for 2013:
10. Big Momma's House 2
9. Willow
8. All About Steve (Director's Cut)
7. From Justin to Kelly
6. Return of the Jedi (Ewok portions only)
5. Mother May I Sleep With Danger
4. She's the Man (portions that foreshadow Amanda Bynes' decline into madness only)
3. Jetsons: The Movie
2. JAG (if it were a movie)
1. Citizen Kane
More end of year fun undoubtedly to follow!
