Tuesday, March 29, 2016
The Idiots Abroad
Well, I am back from Europe. Also from Springfield. Did I mention I was going to Springfield before Europe? I had an oral argument in a case. It was less exotic than Europe, but there was a tornado warning that led the hotel staff to herd us into the basement in the middle of dinner. Thank God they let us bring our wine.
Anyway, Europe was nice. I had wiener schnitzel and sacher torte and one of those giant chocolate-covered pretzels. I went to approximately six billion museums. And I coached my students, who did a really nice job but did not win anything. They were sort of the Jennifer Aniston of the competition, I guess.
Because I had one completely free day while I was over there, I was able to fit in a side trip to Salzburg, in addition to Vienna. That was kind of amazing, even though I did manage to buy a ticket for one train and then actually board another. They have a really cool old castle in Salzburg that sits way up above the city, kind of like it's judging everyone. And you can ride a special train to and from it that feels like the world's most chill rollercoaster. The cathedral there is really only a B-, but still, it was an interesting experience.
More to follow, including endless photos.
Sunday, March 13, 2016
The Weekend
A lot of excitement around here. Yesterday we hosted a truly extravagant dog birthday party, featuring a dog cake that we had to eventually take away from Aubrey before she ingested it so quickly that she choked. There was also a cookie cake for humans, which was devoured with a similar speed. And Aubrey got a brain teaser toy that she bested in an unexpected manner by simply destroying it. Take that, Outward Hound products.
I also took my mother to see the Van Gogh show at the Art Institute. It was pretty good, from what we could see of it around people's heads. I can't honestly muster up too much excitement for the prospect of seeing three different versions of the same painting, but they had some other interesting works, too, and the interpretive materials were well done as always. It was kind of unfortunate that some people apparently decided the museum would be a good place to stop on their way back from the St. Patrick's Day parade; I saw more than one person bobbing and weaving suspiciously in front of the Chagall windows.
And my neighborhood was of course flush with St. Pat's revelers. I believe some sort of new record was set when I passed a deeply intoxicated bro on my way to the gym at 8:30 AM. And the legions of young ladies taking selfies in their ethnically offensive t-shirts threatened to shut down Clark street entirely. Suffice it to say that I will not be upset to be out of the country on the actual St. Patrick's Day.
Monday, March 07, 2016
Current Events
My life continues to be a glittering whirlwind of excitement. Seriously, I feel like Taylor Swift, only with fewer lesbian overtones.
Friday night we had the party/awards ceremony for the bar association show I do each year, and they gave me an award. Not for performing or anything; if this were the Oscars, this would be like the Irving Thalberg award. But that didn’t stop me from carrying it around with me all night like Anne Hathaway. It took the form of a giant cup, which unfortunately was too dirty on the inside to drink from. The cab driver really appreciated it on the way home, though.
Then, because I’m an idiot, I had to get up at 6 AM the next morning to drive to a bar committee meeting in Champaign. There is really no better way to start your day than by almost falling asleep at the wheel and swerving across three lanes of traffic into an oncoming semi. But I made it unharmed and had a lovely morning discussing alternative dispute resolution with law students at my alma mater. It turns out that they’ve actually renovated the classrooms since I went there so they look less like the set of the Carol Burnett Show, but don’t worry, the dingy men’s bathroom with two toilets in one stall is still unaltered. I ate two bagels with cream cheese to celebrate, then felt guilty about it and decided it would be my lunch for the day.
Yesterday was family time, since my mom is up here for her Spring Break. (I feel like I should take her to a foam party or something to celebrate.) We spent a good portion of the afternoon watching my nephew crawl around and pull himself up to a standing position with varying degrees of success. Don’t worry, we had Mission: Impossible 4 on in the background in case there was ever a lull in the action.
