Sunday, October 05, 2025
Fall Fun 2025
Fall is actually not my favorite, but there are plenty of fun ways people can observe it:
-- Noting that, thanks to climate change, it is 80 degrees in October.
-- Denying that climate change exists and citing as evidence the fact that it once snowed in May.
-- Getting the pumpkin spiced meth instead of your regular meth.
-- Working on that Sexy Pope Leo costume.
-- Having impure thoughts about Jack-o-lanterns.
-- Being bummed out by squash.
-- Trying to tell the difference between a scarecrow and Sharon Stone.
-- Paying to pick your own apples and letting them rot in your garage.
-- Arguing with your condo association about the finer points of rules governing Halloween decorations.
-- Saying "sweater weather" repeatedly.
-- Attending Homecomings for places you have no connection to and making people feel bad for not remembering you.
-- Being Meg Ryan.
-- Claiming to have better fall colors than those other guys.
-- Enjoying Hallmark Channel's uncomfortable calculus on when it can start showing Christmas movies.
-- Worrying about the decline of civilization (with cinnamon).
