the ocean

What have I been doing besides going to Mexico?

I performed a show I wrote last weekend. That was something. Completely sold out, though in fairness the capacity was only sixty seats. I dropped a few lyrics, which kind of sucks when you wrote all the lyrics, but by and large it went really well. And now I can use my brain for more socially useful things for a spell again.

Speaking of which, work. I've been doing that. I can't really talk about it because everything I do is so super secret and important. But rest assured it's all super amazing.

We also got our roof deck replaced. So it's not like, rotting into the roof and attracting beehives and such. It took four weeks because of all the rain interrupting construction, but it's done. And it's not even consistently in the 60s yet.

Also, I lost my sense of taste yesterday, which is weird. Yes, I tested, and it is not COVID. Google tells me it can come from colds or other things, too. But if it's not back by tomorrow I'm definitely headed to the minute clinic. Turns out chewing and swallowing aren't so satisfying in and of themselves.

Anyway, I'm doing stuff. As one does.

This is the last round, for better or for worse. Back to regularly scheduled programming as soon as I figure out what that is.

They don't let you climb the pyramids any more, except for one little one. That seems pretty wise to me, frankly, given the agility of your average tourist. Myself included.

The anthropological museum in Mexico City is amazing, plus it gives you the excuse to say "anthropological" over and over again.

This guy seems fun. And I like his hat.

As threatened, here are some photos from our journey to Mexico City. Travel with me now, though of course not literally.

I thought the way this squiggly sculpture contrasted with this geometric painting was interesting. And you can't prove me wrong.

We spent a long weekend in Mexico City this past week. I had never been, and it was pretty great. I will admit that I'd read a New Yorker article about a bunch of students who were abducted and murdered in Mexico immediately prior to the trip, which did not set a great tone. But I resolved to not be like my friend who once refused to attend a wedding in Cancun because she thought she'd be beheaded by narcos, and bravely proceeded to my five-star hotel in the gorgeous city center. 

There was culture! We went to a modern art museum and a contemporary art museum (different things, although they both may involve elderly people saying "my kid could do that") and the anthropological museum, which in addition to being difficult to pronounce had an amazing collection of early American artifacts. We also visited the incredibly stunning castle and checked a lot of boxes on our Instagram list. (Yes, photos will be forthcoming.) And then we made the trek out to Teotihuacan, which was no less fascinating for having been subject to a series of prohibitions on climbing ruins ever since COVID. As someone who once became terrified after reaching the top of Chichen Itza and nearly had to be retrieved by rescue personnel, I believe temple scaling to be highly overrated.

We also got religion, with a stop at the Our Lady of Guadalupe site. As a Catholic with more than eight years of Public School Religion classes under my belt, it was nice to put a location with the low-quality animated short that relayed to us the story of this particular miracle. There are approximately ten thousand chapels of various vintages there, as well as the main church with the famous image, which is now installed behind a series of moving walkways so nobody can hog all the time with the Virgin. Unfortunately, no churro stand that I could find, but I'm sure that's coming.

Speaking of which, food! I was very much tempted, but ultimately too fearful, to eat any of the delicious-looking elote or tacos that blanketed many public areas in the city. But we did have some great traditional meals, as well as a contemporary culinary journey at a restaurant that someone (I don't remember who) has ranked #47 in the world. My understanding is that Chili's did not even make this list.

Anyway, I'm back, and will torture you with further discussion as the weeks go by. Something to look forward to!

This one is for my AP Art History homies, who know that Discobolus was sculpted by Myron in roughly 450 BC.

I have traveled to London and back and lived to tell the tale. Barely. I could not sleep on my flight out and therefore spent my first day wandering around in a haze thinking about whether I could maybe curl up and nap on a bench in St. Paul's. Also I did not get to shower for that first day, which is very important for you to remember as you analyze my hair in photos. Oh, and United served me alleged "cheese blintzes" which were covered in a sugary, syrupy mess that nearly brought the earlier "pesto pasta" back up. 

Anyway, it was a pretty good trip. I got some light tourism in, such as climbing up the dome of St. Paul's. 

They also have a crypt, but not nearly as many big names as Westminster Abbey. Here's William Blake, whose memorial could frankly use a bit of a glow up.

Tate Modern is still fine as hell. I did not partake of the Yoko Ono show, as I thought it might kill me in my sleep-deprived stupor. 

You know you're having a great weekend when you're compulsively searching your house for a pink spiral bound notebook containing the details of your 2000 European vacation so you can confirm whether it was the National Gallery or the British Museum you went to or both. See, I'm headed to London tomorrow for work and may have a bit of time for tourism, and god forbid I go to the same places I saw more than two decades ago. (Though the Tate Modern is exempt from that rule, as I love it and they've added a whole building since I was last there.) I mean, seeing the Rosetta Stone twice is basically an asshole move. So I have to get to the bottom of this vital issue through a little archeological dig of my own.

Other than that, I'm lightly working, getting up in the gym working on my fitness (hat tip to Fergie), and going to a Steppenwolf event that my friend is organizing tonight. Oh, and we watched Killers of the Flower Moon last night, bringing us to eight out of ten best picture nominees viewed. It was well made but so, so long. Like, we were thinking we'd split it in half but at the two hour mark just agreed that we felt a strong urge to get it wrapped up once and for all. We did take water breaks and pee breaks (circle of life), though. I can't imagine if we'd seen it in theaters and had to watch Leo make that frowny face for three and half hours straight without any kind of respite. 

I also went out and saw my niece and nephew for a bit. Maggie has been cast as a pirate in a production of Peter Pan (updated and non racist, to be clear) and is absolutely loving it. I did always feel she had the appropriate qualities for piracy. Jack has just finished book six of Harry Potter and is a bit too focused on the body count for my liking. But reading is in fact fundamental, as they say. 

Anyway, I'm sure to have an excessive number of thoughts on London when I return, so look out.

Can we talk for a minute about the things that Google, Facebook, etc. think that I will want to buy? I mean, some of it is dead on, like cute shoes I don't need and expensive lighting fixtures I will lust after but never purchase. But some of it is downright insulting. Like, generic Viagra? What am I, the elderly father of a Real Housewife? Hair regrowth products? Obviously they have not seen my glorious mane standing at full attention after a night sleeping in my CPAP. Bride Living magazine? I am offended that they believe this is something that I would like to know exists. 

And then there is the apparel they think I would like to wear: lots of animal prints, shiny fabrics, exceedingly slutty underwear, large eyewear. Unless and until I decide to audition for Mob Wives, these should remain off the table. 

And don't get me started on Facebook Marketplace! Why do they think I might want a 1990 Jeep Grand Wagoneer? A lightly used vending machine? An apartment in Midlothian? These are less offensive than just plain questionable. I worry for the future of technology. Though come to think of it, some of that slutty underwear was pretty cute.

I'm doing another show! Don't worry, it's definitely not a self-indulgent vanity production.

You can get your tickets here: Workin' It! And now I've completely made your weekend.

We did a quick weekend in New York in honor of my birthday. Well, really in honor of me wanting to see Merrily We Roll Along while it's still running since it hasn't been on Broadway for roughly forty years, but my birthday was a fine enough excuse. The show was great, and I take any bad things I ever said about Daniel Radcliffe, though I can't specifically recall there really ever being any. Jonathan Groff was great too and I guess I have to officially forgive him for being friends with Lea Michele. Lindsay Mendez was actually out that night, but her understudy (Sherz Aletaha) was beyond amazing, so we didn't feel too bad about it. Five stars, definite recommend, etc. and so forth.

While we were in town we also went to the Met and had some fun meals. I forgot how exhausting the Met can be; it turns out we walked seven miles just looking at art. And the crowds are intense and seemingly wholly unaware of the concept of personal space. But we saw some good stuff I hadn't seen before or at least don't remember seeing. Also? Thomas Hart Benton. Kind of a baller. Give it a google, you'll see.

Anyway, we're back. And working tomorrow. But I'm proud of us for having fun things to break the winter up this year. It's already February and I haven't yet reached the point of total despair!

First things first, this is not going to be any sort of discourse on Barbie and its nominations and/or non-nominations. I'll leave the hot takes to the people who actually want attention. (Well, I want it, but only the positive kind.) I did finally see Barbie and enjoyed it but I've never for a second believed that awards nominations would ever be any sort of objective barometer of quality or social worth or any of those things. The Oscars are just a thing that happens and its fine or its not but at least it's not sports for five seconds every year.

Anyway, as we often do, we've been trying to see some of the Oscar movies. It's not ideal, as it will require some degree of leaving the house in winter, as several of the nominees are not yet available on demand. But we did see Maestro, which I liked. I'm actually a complete expert on Bernstein because I read a biography of him last year, and I thought the movie was a good representation of his complexity. And frankly I would have been good just hearing the music again, because it's amazing. We also saw Saltburn, which ended up being nominated for nothing, but I really enjoyed it. Yes, it was insane and filthy and thank god I didn't try to watch it with my mother, but I thought it was beautifully shot, well acted, and completely worked on its own crazy terms. I do reject any attempt to label Barry Keoghan as "hot," as he is like four feet tall and a bit busted, but I'll look at anybody nude. 

We saw Oppenheimer this summer and thought it was good? Maybe I've posted about this before? I'm too lazy to go back and look, but I thought the acting was strong, the story was well put together, and it didn't feel as long as it was. And I generally feel like I could cut twenty minutes out of every single movie without anybody really missing anything. And we saw The Holdovers. I guess I thought I'd laugh more, but I don't really know why I thought that. It was well done and I enjoyed it just fine. Feel free to put that quote on a poster.

Anyway, I guess we're about halfway through the best picture nominees. I doubt we'll make it all the way, but hey, we're doing stuff.

It has been a wild weather week here in Chicago. Below zero temperatures (Fahrenheit, not Celsius, for the entire rest of the world) and a bit of snow. As regular readers of this space will know, cold weather makes me crazy. I had to wait ten minutes for trains a couple of times this week and I found myself swearing audibly to myself. Also, I wanted to scream at people on the train to take their goddamned backpacks off so they weren't constantly smacking others with them unintentionally. (This used to be an unwritten rule of train etiquette, along with maintaining respectful silence during rush hour, but of course COVID ruined everything.) So yes, things are going well. 

I did bring out my space heater at work. It has become one of my most treasured possessions, because I love to sit right over it and essentially roast myself, but I am also incredibly insecure about it, since it is technically against building policy. (Or maybe it's some kind of local ordinance, I don't know. It's not like I'm a lawyer or anything.) I hide it at night because I fear someone from building management taking it away, as I heard tell happened at my last building. Have space heaters actually led to towering infernos before and I just don't know about it? This is 100% possible given my level of awareness of news.

My amateur theatrical for lawyers was this weekend. As my regular readers will know (hi, mom) I am part of a rather ridiculous concept whereby licensed attorneys spend several weeks learning parody songs and dances to present in an array of wigs and costumes at a theater that is way too nice to host such madness. (If you know what Capitol Steps was, it's kind of like that, and also congratulations on being middle aged and nerdy.) We took a few years off for the pandemic, so this was our first big show in a while. And we were at a different theater after like eight years in the same spot. And we did it in January instead of December. So much change! How could we ever triumph over such adversity?