Thursday, March 18, 2004
Requiem
Another business that I loved has folded. This time it’s a really awesome record store, the kind with obscure imports and classical discs that you’re really glad to have available despite never actually buying them. I almost wept as I picked over the corpse of this fine establishment, trying to find a rare hidden gem underneath all the Willa Ford and 3LW in the $4.99 clearance bin. But since a cheap copy of Rico Suave’s greatest hits didn’t seem worth the shoving match with a thirteen-year-old girl, I walked away empty handed. Although, for the record, I think I could have taken the bitch in a fair fight.
But the larger point is, as always, that God hates me. This is the second record store I’ve lost this year, along with two dive bars, a burrito place, and a cute indie movie theater. Not to mention the fact that Dominick’s stopped carrying those Kraft Fresh Prep meals I like so much and could always pretend I made myself from scratch. And something horrible always comes in where these businesses were, like a manicure salon or a Starbucks or a Republican Party Headquarters. As it turns out, I am the kiss of death to all commerce.
I try not to let it bother me, though. Despite these losses, I’ve still got a lot to be grateful for, like Fruity Pebbles, Chipotle, and The OC on FOX. Now if I could just figure out how to hook my VCR up to the digital cable, I might be off the suicide watch once and for all...
Another business that I loved has folded. This time it’s a really awesome record store, the kind with obscure imports and classical discs that you’re really glad to have available despite never actually buying them. I almost wept as I picked over the corpse of this fine establishment, trying to find a rare hidden gem underneath all the Willa Ford and 3LW in the $4.99 clearance bin. But since a cheap copy of Rico Suave’s greatest hits didn’t seem worth the shoving match with a thirteen-year-old girl, I walked away empty handed. Although, for the record, I think I could have taken the bitch in a fair fight.
But the larger point is, as always, that God hates me. This is the second record store I’ve lost this year, along with two dive bars, a burrito place, and a cute indie movie theater. Not to mention the fact that Dominick’s stopped carrying those Kraft Fresh Prep meals I like so much and could always pretend I made myself from scratch. And something horrible always comes in where these businesses were, like a manicure salon or a Starbucks or a Republican Party Headquarters. As it turns out, I am the kiss of death to all commerce.
I try not to let it bother me, though. Despite these losses, I’ve still got a lot to be grateful for, like Fruity Pebbles, Chipotle, and The OC on FOX. Now if I could just figure out how to hook my VCR up to the digital cable, I might be off the suicide watch once and for all...
