Tuesday, July 20, 2004
The Way We Were
– Anchorman. Okay, so it’s not exactly a Moliere comedy. But I’d pay the $9 just to see Will Ferrell play jazz flute any day. And I don’t mean that in a dirty way; I imagine that would cost a lot more than $9.
– The Lincoln Park Zoo. One of those nice, non-corrupt zoos where the animals don’t appear to have been drugged or tazered. If I could get e-mail alerts letting me know when the meerkats will be sequestered in "a non-public space," however, it would save me a lot of heartbreak.
– Automotive Repair. I’ve learned that the magic words are "I’m just out of money." After that they don’t seem to worry so much that the alignment of your rear license plate lights might be slightly off.
– The Emmy Nominations. It’s just nice to finally see Tyne Daly get the recognition she deserves.
– Courtney Love. Apparently, she now has a "legal guardian." It’s hard to think of a worse celebrity-related job, unless it’s "Carrot Top’s hairdresser" or "Michael Jackson’s Grammys date."
– The Political Conventions. I’d like to see them formatted more like a celebrity roast or a WB-produced dating show. Just put the candidates in a hot tub, start insulting them, and watch the sparks fly!
– Anchorman. Okay, so it’s not exactly a Moliere comedy. But I’d pay the $9 just to see Will Ferrell play jazz flute any day. And I don’t mean that in a dirty way; I imagine that would cost a lot more than $9.
– The Lincoln Park Zoo. One of those nice, non-corrupt zoos where the animals don’t appear to have been drugged or tazered. If I could get e-mail alerts letting me know when the meerkats will be sequestered in "a non-public space," however, it would save me a lot of heartbreak.
– Automotive Repair. I’ve learned that the magic words are "I’m just out of money." After that they don’t seem to worry so much that the alignment of your rear license plate lights might be slightly off.
– The Emmy Nominations. It’s just nice to finally see Tyne Daly get the recognition she deserves.
– Courtney Love. Apparently, she now has a "legal guardian." It’s hard to think of a worse celebrity-related job, unless it’s "Carrot Top’s hairdresser" or "Michael Jackson’s Grammys date."
– The Political Conventions. I’d like to see them formatted more like a celebrity roast or a WB-produced dating show. Just put the candidates in a hot tub, start insulting them, and watch the sparks fly!
