Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Body by Jay
So I've been going to this gym in my office building on weekdays. It's nice in some ways, because it's sort of hard to think of excuses not to go when it's only five minutes from your desk and it's generally not too crowded, since only people from my building can go there and my office is not technically speaking the most athletic place in America. It's also sort of terrible at times, primarily because I don't really need to see my coworkers wangs, but also because the locker room is terribly, terribly small, causing strangers to often feel the need to engage me in unnecessary conversation. Today, for instance, a Stage III Smalltalker latched on to me the minute I got in the door. Well, not the exact minute I got in there -- at that point he was still singing "Still The One" loudly to himself. But within thirty seconds, he had shifted over to asking me why his shirt was wet (answer: I did not know) and telling me all about his workout (topic sentence: it was freaking awesome). Then he settled into a strict routine of soliciting my views on whatever happened to be shown on ESPN at any given moment. I have frankly never put my clothes on so quickly in my life, and that includes the time I woke up from that one night stand with Celine Dion.
So I've been going to this gym in my office building on weekdays. It's nice in some ways, because it's sort of hard to think of excuses not to go when it's only five minutes from your desk and it's generally not too crowded, since only people from my building can go there and my office is not technically speaking the most athletic place in America. It's also sort of terrible at times, primarily because I don't really need to see my coworkers wangs, but also because the locker room is terribly, terribly small, causing strangers to often feel the need to engage me in unnecessary conversation. Today, for instance, a Stage III Smalltalker latched on to me the minute I got in the door. Well, not the exact minute I got in there -- at that point he was still singing "Still The One" loudly to himself. But within thirty seconds, he had shifted over to asking me why his shirt was wet (answer: I did not know) and telling me all about his workout (topic sentence: it was freaking awesome). Then he settled into a strict routine of soliciting my views on whatever happened to be shown on ESPN at any given moment. I have frankly never put my clothes on so quickly in my life, and that includes the time I woke up from that one night stand with Celine Dion.
