Tuesday, October 01, 2013
Mixed Messages
I am beginning to fear that I am watching too much Lifetime & Hallmark Channel. I am now aware of so many products and services that most males in their thirties cannot even imagine. I have experienced the triumph of the lady who loves her mini catheter because it's so small and unobtrusive she can just take it with her everywhere she goes. I have felt the pain of the woman who wants to crawl under her desk because flower-scented sprays can't mask the odor of her light bladder leakage, or LBL for short. I have joined in the puzzlement of the woman from Dancing With The Stars who dances in an adult diaper "even though she doesn't need one" to demonstrate how slim and trim the new designs are. I actually considered calling to order that long, narrow tube you can hook on to your vacuum to clean the lint out of your dryer. (Is it called a Lint Lizard, maybe? I'm too lazy to google.) None of these things are good signs.
Also, I am aware of the fact that the Andie MacDowell series "Cedar Cove" exists. Let me be clear that I have never watched it. Okay, maybe the last five minutes once because it was on right before the Frasier reruns. Bruce Boxleitner is unrecognizable.
And don't even get me started on Dance Moms. That woman haunts my dreams.
I am beginning to fear that I am watching too much Lifetime & Hallmark Channel. I am now aware of so many products and services that most males in their thirties cannot even imagine. I have experienced the triumph of the lady who loves her mini catheter because it's so small and unobtrusive she can just take it with her everywhere she goes. I have felt the pain of the woman who wants to crawl under her desk because flower-scented sprays can't mask the odor of her light bladder leakage, or LBL for short. I have joined in the puzzlement of the woman from Dancing With The Stars who dances in an adult diaper "even though she doesn't need one" to demonstrate how slim and trim the new designs are. I actually considered calling to order that long, narrow tube you can hook on to your vacuum to clean the lint out of your dryer. (Is it called a Lint Lizard, maybe? I'm too lazy to google.) None of these things are good signs.
Also, I am aware of the fact that the Andie MacDowell series "Cedar Cove" exists. Let me be clear that I have never watched it. Okay, maybe the last five minutes once because it was on right before the Frasier reruns. Bruce Boxleitner is unrecognizable.
And don't even get me started on Dance Moms. That woman haunts my dreams.
