the ocean

This is not going to be easy, but I want to address what I feel is one of the most challenging and important issues of our time: the summer 2002 departure of Naturi Naughton from the R&B super group 3LW.

You see, 3LW made a name for itself as one of many early '00s artists who sounded vaguely like Destiny's Child and appealed to pre-teens who used their parents' dial-up internet connections to vote for the videos that would appear on MTV's Total Request Live. (This is where I admit I once engaged in a one-man campaign to drive Christina Aguilera's "Come on Over, Baby" to the top of that chart.) They broke big with "No More (Baby I'ma Do Right)," a tribute to semi-controlled lisping and kickflair jeans, and followed up with the philosophical wisdom of "Playas Gonna Play." They were on top of the world, as were we all, frankly.

But then it was as if a bomb dropped with Naturi left the group or, if you believe her account of it, was forced out by "the two light-skinned girls" after being pelted with a KFC two-piece fried chicken meal with mashed potatoes and mac and cheese. Former bandmates Kiely Williams and Adrienne Bailon meanwhile claimed ignorance, insisting that they had no idea why Naturi departed or why there was mac and cheese ground into the upholstery of the Econoline van they had rented for their tour. But Naturi was adamant that she had been chided and marginalized for failing to be enough of a "ghetto thug girl." (All quotes from an archived MTV news dot com story I accessed through Wikipedia.)

The resulting maelstrom thrust this country into a frank and at times unpleasant discussion about race, class, and gender that, frankly, forever changed the way we as people interact with one another. No, actually everyone lost interest fairly quickly and moved on to wondering if Jessica Simpson was really as dumb as she acted on Newlyweds or something. Kiely and Adrienne went on to be members of The Cheetah Girls with Raven Symone, a girl group that also broke up under dramatic circumstances, although this time perhaps not involving airborne foodstuffs. Naturi I think tried to have a solo career but is now best known (by me at least) for a guest appearance on Mad Men that I didn't know was her until years later when I was randomly IMDBing Mad Men episodes to discuss with my sister, who had just started watching it.

Anyway, things worked out, I guess? But the KFC-flinging remains a hotly debated topic today, with Kiely having only recently explained that she was attempting to reach for Naturi's neck (no doubt to give her a calming massage) rather than intending to throw food. Adrienne did apologize to Naturi in an exceedingly non-specific way on an episode of her talk show The Real, though. Our nation is healing.