the ocean

Can we talk for a minute about the things that Google, Facebook, etc. think that I will want to buy? I mean, some of it is dead on, like cute shoes I don't need and expensive lighting fixtures I will lust after but never purchase. But some of it is downright insulting. Like, generic Viagra? What am I, the elderly father of a Real Housewife? Hair regrowth products? Obviously they have not seen my glorious mane standing at full attention after a night sleeping in my CPAP. Bride Living magazine? I am offended that they believe this is something that I would like to know exists. 

And then there is the apparel they think I would like to wear: lots of animal prints, shiny fabrics, exceedingly slutty underwear, large eyewear. Unless and until I decide to audition for Mob Wives, these should remain off the table. 

And don't get me started on Facebook Marketplace! Why do they think I might want a 1990 Jeep Grand Wagoneer? A lightly used vending machine? An apartment in Midlothian? These are less offensive than just plain questionable. I worry for the future of technology. Though come to think of it, some of that slutty underwear was pretty cute.